Happy New Year

10 months, 3 days. I get married in 10 months and three days. Mr shawesome and I are going to start eating healthily. We both are not happy with the weight we've put on and getting back on the weight watchers horse. He's never done it before, not serously. I did try with him once but he then proceeded to eat a packet of biscuits.

I found a handy website that works out his pp allowance as paying for another account would be a waste as he can access everything else online for free or in my online account.

So now this isn't just one journey, it's two.

New target

So I'm like a yo yo, I go down and then back up. 2013 is a big year for me. I'm getting married in October to the mr shawsome :)

I have no ultimate set goal for what I want to be like, but I am going to set myself a goal for February. In February mr. Shawsome and I are going to go to panama. I haven't been in 8 years, and its a long flight. I want to lose 2 stone by then.

I weighed myself this morning and I've gone back up to a whopping 23stone 5lbs. So by the time I get to February I want to be at the very least. 21st 5lbs. It's not much of a difference in the grand scheme of things but it will make for a more comfortable journey (it can take 24hours to get there!) I want to look better, feel better etc.

So the mission starts 2nd Jan. I'm going to need motivation and will power to change my uber bad habits and get into more healthy ones.

Lunch

I'm a busy girl, on some days I have 2 jobs on others I have 4. So I don't always have the time to actually make a healthy meal until as late as 9:30pm. So I've tried today tesco's light choice spaghetti and meatball ready meal. Now I'm not a fan of ready meals. But as they go, it's alright. I'd give it 7 out of 10.

I'm not a fan of bits in my sauces, so and this is full of veg such as onions so left the majority of the sauce. But the meatballs were not that bad at all. So it's something I would have again and recommend it to others. A bonus of these ready meals is that it has the pro points already printed on them for convenience.

What a horrid day!

It's been awful, absolutely awful today! The worst part is, that it's not over. My brain is on overload! Just taking a break from work, having my lunch and pointing it all!

On the menu today:

Tesco's tomato and mozzarella Kiev - 8pp

Brown rice - 150g - 6pp

Carrot sticks - 0pp

A cheeky 14 pp for lunch, but still leaving me with 27 for the rest of the day!

Last night i gave the go ahead for the boyfriend to apply for a job on the other side of the country in his home town. It would mean i would go with him. It would be much better for him to do this. He would be working for a decent manufacturer, in the same company as his dad and have a stable job. Opposed as to what he is doing now.

I can transfer locations with one of my jobs (thank goodness for national chains!) I can pick up my youth work near by, even as volunteer and go back to university to study. The only thing i will miss down here is my few friends and family. But even then mum has already declared she would sell her home, buy a flat down here and one up north.

I think this is the best choice for us. It's playing on my mind though. But we can't be in limbo forever just for basic convenience. It adds stress, unneeded stress at that!

Wanted: real friends!

I'm ashamed to say I now consider my self without any real friends. How did I come to this conclusion? Well my one BFF ( if a 25 year old can actually have one, that may be a teen thing) has not spoken to me in around 2 weeks. I have not the foggiest as to why either. It isn't the first time either! Why should I always put a stop to my life to suit her? You know I would ring her and she would not answer, if I rang on withheld she would. Again, that is not a friendship. The excuse of having a child is not valid in my opinion as well she hasnt changed. Still the same old bull crap! Her child is now 6 months and I can say I have held her around 7 times!

I have friends don't get me wrong, but not real good, I can turn to at whatever the time of day/night friends. So now I am engaged, have been for 8 months and still have not chosen bridesmaids.

It was a given said ex BFF was maid of honour, as I was at her wedding. But she has not shown a bit of interest in the wedding apart from going to a wedding show because she wants to get away from her husband. When I said the next I wanted to go to was next year she then asked how about we went to go see the venue sometime in September? Not occurring to her that it's not as easy as just going. I have 3 jobs to get time off with.

So today I've been driving back from ikea after buying candles for the engagement part (which she was invited to weeks ago and has not even responded to texts and fb) and thinking about my bridesmaids.

I think that the bridesmaids I have will reflect parts of my life. My next door neighbour, we grew up together, playing everyday. My university friend. We went through so much together and talked everyday, she was also there the night we met. And the girl I would call a friend who is from bf's home town.

I have not asked them yet and would hope they wouldn't say no. It's that or I need to get me some new friends and fast!!!!

That is all, rant over

Lots of love

Girl in the fatsuit!

Am I thin yet?

Has anyone had that feeling? You start a healthy routine (I do not want to say diet) and you forget it is a lifestyle change, a slow slog etc but expect to see dramatic results in next to no time? Yeah, that's me. Which could be the problem really.

I dread the idea of withholding food I adore. I have no will power and do not understand the concept of moderation, after all I wouldn't be in the situation I am in today. At work we sell these delicious sea salt fudge. They are to die for! But I have foregone the fudge and do I feel better for that choice? No! But I'm hoping that I will feel better for it in a month for my holiday, and in 13 months, for my wedding!

So Am I thin yet? Sadly no, but day by day I will be closer!

Lots of love,

The girl in the fat suit

Hello Old Friends

So yes, the yo-yo dieter is back! i am due on on holiday in a month and only now do i panic! I need to get my ass into gear! I have completed day one of my WW, and had all my points. I recently decided it was the best idea in the world to buy a cross trainer. So i found one on ebay, bout it for around £40, stuffed it in my minute flat and have used it once... pfffft. I keep saying i want to use it when the bf is out the house, but because of his new work schedule...he is now in when i am in. So here i start... weighing the grand total of 22.8stone... i know realistically i won't lose that much in a month, but hoping i comes off the bum! I'm more scared about fitting in a plane seat comfortably than any one seeing me in my swim suit! wish me luck!