Thursday, 11 March 2010
Hi there! My name is Stephie and i am the girl in the fat suit. Not literally but i am a girl and i am packing a few extra pounds...well packing a few extra stones to be honest.
I always seemed content to the outside world with who i am/was (still not sure which one it should be) but to be honest i was not. From a young age i was forever praying and wishing i could be thin, wished i had magic hands that would make the fat just disappear. I was always the fat girl, the fat friend, the one everyone loved but never in love with. I'd find a few guys who loved me for me but i was always self conscious. Saying that i am now in a loving relationship for 2 and a half years and could not be happier.
Recently i went on a holiday and had the time of my life with free bars and all inclusive breakfasts and dinners and of course my friends. But looking back on the pictures, i looked so big and round. I couldn't recognise myself. What i saw through my eyes what not who i was in my mind. In my mind i am a size 12... in reality i was a size 24!
My mother has always been on my back about my weight. She also from a young age suffered with weight issues and around 10 years ago was one of the first in the country to receive a gastric band. I saw how much weight she was loosing yes...but i also had a back stage pass so to speak and saw what she didn't want others to see. I saw the constant throwing up, the pain she went through eating... how she only drank her meals and never ate with us and it was something i did not want.
So with all of that in my mind, that horrible pictures from the holiday, the snide remarks and laughs from perfect strangers, my mother pressuring me for something i did not want i went and joined Weight Watchers.
Now i have done diets in my time..but the thing is.. i love food too much, i want to be able to go out with friends and have a meal, be able to order a take away etc. But i knew i had to do something soon. I want to be able to go into New look and browse the entire shop instead of a tiny section with semi nice clothes... i want to choose my clothes rather than a that will do outfit.
So as i said, i did my first week of weight watchers, which has made me slightly even more obsessed with food, but i haven't always denied myself of everything. I had 2 chocolate bars during the week, i had chicken kebab... although no chips. I have even eaten a packet of crisps... and guess what... i lost 10 pounds in my first week! I already feel a difference.
So i am going to put up some blogs about me, my weight loss, my life and hoping i can get somethings off my chest, get advice and encouragement! I am currently on week 2 of weight watchers and now feel like i can conquer the world!
So my 5% of my body weight goal is 21st
I started at 22st 3lb
Week one 21st 7lb - a loss of 10 lbs!!